Back to school..and blogging

So, it's been a while.  I can give you any numbers of excuses as to why I haven't been blogging, but they'd all be pretty lame.  Truth is, life just got in the way.  But anyway, I'm back to entertain you for five minutes each week or so.  How lucky you are!

I've actually had a number of people come up to me in the past year or so asking why I don't post anymore. 

So here goes  my attempt to reclaim my former blogger glory. And by glory, I mean the 60 to 80 blog views I used to get.

The reason I have all this free time to write again is because Thing 2 has started junior kindergarten!  As I stood there this morning watching her walk in the front door with the rest of the JK's, I of course uttered the words "FREEDOM!".  When I looked around though, I seemed to be the only one not bawling my eyes out.  What kind of father am I?  Not even a little sad to see his youngest leave him for good.  I'll tell you what kind of father I am: A proud one.  She walked through those gates like she owned the place.  Not even a moment's hesitation or mournful look back to me.  She was ready.  Truth is, she's been ready for at least two years.

Do you want to know what I hate about back to school though?  Not the endless facebook posts from all my friends of their kids back to school photos, because they're all so damn cute. It's those stupid signs each kid is holding.  Not only that, but the fact that I have to do it too.  Last year I wrote it on white paper with black marker. Simple and to the point.  But oh the shitstorm I took for that.  You got Pinterest giving all these parents stupid ideas with elaborate signs all decked out with f-ing tassles and glitter.  Hell, even the craft store Michael's had a sign making workshop that I didn't sign up for.  I got hell from my wife too for that.

So a mom friend of mine graciously gave my some extra premade signs that they were giving out at the grocery store.  The problem?  They're printed over a forest green background to make it look like an old chalkboard.  Forest f-ing green.   Do you know what you can use to write on shiny forest green paper?  Sweet nothing.  I tried white crayons, killed two gel pens and even tried chalk.  Nothing worked well.  By the second kid's sign, I was literally scratching through the green to get to the write underneath.    

Didn't think that through too much, did you Loblaws?

Until next time, folks!  Now, I just have to remember how to publish the blog...