Disclaimer: Being a Stay-at-home-Dad (SAHD for the purposes of this blog) is the best and most fulfilling job I've ever had (Mind you I worked in accounting for 11 years, so the bar wasn't set very high). The hours are brutal and pay really sucks, but the benefits are pretty sweet. Having said this, my life is now filled with some pretty hilarious, ridiculous, and the downright bizarre moments.
As this is my first post, I should give a little background. I quit my job to stay at home with our two kids back in September 2014. At the time, my son (Thing 1) was barely 2 and my daughter (Thing 2) was 4 months. Not that I thought it would be a cakewalk, but I did think it would be less stressful than being a credit manager, of which my career had dead-ended at. Now, the most stressful thing I have to worry about is what the hell I'm going to feed everyone for dinner...
Before I began this endeavour a year and a half ago, I had read that more and more dads were choosing to do the same. I thought, great, I'll make the leap and easily find like-minded dads who've done the same. Well, not so much.
So far, I've met one other guy on parental leave. The rest? All women. ALL OF THEM.
For the most part , outings with the kids leave me with the feeling like I'm intruding on Uterus-only territory. If you've seen any meme's about stay-at-home-dads, I'm telling you now, no matter how ridiculous they seem, they're all freaking true.
Like this one:
See the one there with the Predator at the park? That's me apparently. I've brought the kids to the park many a time where the moms/caregivers immediately start talking in hushed tones as soon as we arrive. Huddling closer to each other, glancing over their shoulders, making sure I'm at a safe distance from them and there kids. Look, I already have two kids under 4. Do you really think I'd want one of yours too? Also, I'm wearing a wedding ring. I have all the crazy I need in my life.
So the other day, I took Thing 2 her little story and song group at the local library. It's for 2's and 3's and she loves it. So we were the first ones in the room and I took a spot along one of the walls and sat down on the floor. Now it's a small room and there's about 12 or so adults and a ton of kids. So not a lot of room to share. Did I mention I was the only male over the age of 3? Well, I am. So anyway, the next six women that come into the class with their kids cram themselves shoulder to shoulder as far away from me as possible as if I'm a ripe diaper. It's like junior high all over again I tell you. Eventually, the room fills up and some older caregiver ladies sit next to me and I feel a little less awkward in the room. At least my daughter enjoys herself.
Oh that's not all for this excursion. So then they brought out the big parachute in the open room next door after the class. You know the kind where everyone grabs a handle and makes it blow up and down while the kids run under giggling and screaming? Thing 2 was off playing and suddenly decides she wants to partake. So I go over and grab a handle. The lady next to me immediately moves away and grabs a different one. I seriously smelled a pit on one of the parachute upswings to see if I was a little rank or something. I wasn't.
Welcome to my SAHD existence.
So the other day, I took Thing 2 her little story and song group at the local library. It's for 2's and 3's and she loves it. So we were the first ones in the room and I took a spot along one of the walls and sat down on the floor. Now it's a small room and there's about 12 or so adults and a ton of kids. So not a lot of room to share. Did I mention I was the only male over the age of 3? Well, I am. So anyway, the next six women that come into the class with their kids cram themselves shoulder to shoulder as far away from me as possible as if I'm a ripe diaper. It's like junior high all over again I tell you. Eventually, the room fills up and some older caregiver ladies sit next to me and I feel a little less awkward in the room. At least my daughter enjoys herself.
Oh that's not all for this excursion. So then they brought out the big parachute in the open room next door after the class. You know the kind where everyone grabs a handle and makes it blow up and down while the kids run under giggling and screaming? Thing 2 was off playing and suddenly decides she wants to partake. So I go over and grab a handle. The lady next to me immediately moves away and grabs a different one. I seriously smelled a pit on one of the parachute upswings to see if I was a little rank or something. I wasn't.
Welcome to my SAHD existence.
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